Fall TV is finally here!

Okay so fall tv is finally back hurray! with that note…..Halloween is coming too. Welcome Great Pumpkin! I get excited every year yes even on tv to see Charlie Brown The Great Pumpkin.

Season 5 of Downton Abbey is wonderful. You will love watching it on PBS when it comes to the states Jan 2015. you will be shocked and Surprised.

Haven’t watched much of WWE wrestling it’s getting boring and tiring ha ha. go figrue!

Once upon a time is amazing. Great start with Ana and Elsa hope that Elsa finds Ana again. Loved the giant marshmallow too that was wonderful. Hopefully Regina will get her happy ever after soon. I hope so. It sucks that it keeps going and going. Her next move is pretty much getting rid of Marian. I don’t think she’ll get the great outcome I think that Robin will just stay single and be completely devastated all over again if he looses Marian again.

Revenge is great Victoria got out of the hospital. Plus David Clark got a hold of her at the end of episode. I wonder what’s going to happen here? But I can’t wait for tonight.

Total Divas is awesome. I can’t believe how much Natalya hates Summer. I mean really? good grief. Summer isn’t that bad I mean come on. I hope Nattie and TJ are divorcing. A guy is a Guy??? Wake up Nattie? Didn’t have all that the years before and now it’s all getting to you that’s stupid. You need to start things first it looks like with TJ. You should already know him since you’ve been together for 12 yrs. before marriage. jeez.

Modern Family, Blackish, The Goldbergs, and The Middle are all wonderful. love them all.

NCIS and NCIS new orleans are wonderful too totally love em both love that they are back to back. makes a lot of sense!

Halloween is almost here again…….but also that means GRIMM will be back with season 4 whose excited? I TOTALLY AM READY FOR GRIMM……I LOVE MONROE!!!!!!!

so that is all for now………………

SO fifty fans…….check out twitter and follow some of the FIfty Shades RP familes. they are great with great stories. The movie will be here sooner than you think!

Happy Halloween….

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles…………The New 2014 movie!

Yes I finally saw Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. They did a great job on this film. Also so glad they did not make the turtles aliens. (well us fans know the back story of the ooze and such too lol) but either way it was great. Re lived a lot of my childhood watching the new TMNT.

At one point I thought they were going to have Splinter killed. I was going to lose it. Thinking No SPLINTER CAN’T DIE! So I was thrilled that he did not die. that would’ve wrecked everything for me. 

I liked the story line of April and the turtles and her character as a little girl with and being involved with the story as a whole. 

Megan Fox did not do a terrible job at this role. Remember the first movie? April was portrayed here the same way she was portrayed in the first film that was out in the late 80’s or very early 90’s (sorry not good with my time tables at the moment) Her character was portrayed more serious and very little humor was brought to her. As again she discovered who the mysterious vigilantes were. 

In the second movie April did have more of a comedic role and had more of a foundation with the Turtles. Especially when they had to move out of the sewer and her learning more about Splinter and the boys. The ooze and here in the remake she leaned all of that this first film which there were some comedic parts to her role. But again not so much because of the story line as whole during the movie. 

So I just appreciated the movie altogether and will definitely buy it when it is released on Blu Ray/DVD. 

So I like it when they do sequels if they keep most of the same characters. We will see as 2016 comes around as the new movie will be released June 3rd 2016. Cowabunga! <3 I love being a turtle <3 


Monday………….and it’s Hulk Hogan’s Birthday Celebration!!!

So whose going to watch RAW tonight or Tomorrow at some point? I’m interested in seeing what goes down Rumors were Kevin Nash and such could do a NWO reunion for the Hulkamania’s birthday Celebration. 

If you get to see RAW LIVE awesome. It will be in Portland Oregon tonight! and drats lol I wish I could go. I’m 3 hrs away but alas not in my cards for now. 

Going on If you are big fans of E.L. James go to her website and check it out. There are some awesome things This lady and talented Author has on her site. you won’t be disappointed. 

As for now I don’t blame her for putting Fifty on the back burner though. Looking forward to her other stories she may tell first before going back to Fifty if she decides to do so. Plus with Universal doing all three movies E.L. James will have her hands full as she will want to be part of how the movies are going down. 

They do have a screenwriter for Darker that is as much as I know and found out via google and other fifty shades blog sites and twitters :) 

Hope your monday is a good one. 

Happy Birthday Mr. Hulk Hogan <3 Enjoy your celebration! 

what’s going on with me….

well for the past week now i’ve been up very early (which doesn’t bother me) but by afternoon somewhere after 1pm I am sleeping. taking naps. ugh :( sleeping for a very long time. I know I feel depressed It’s just summer and I want it gone! I like summer but it’s harder when you have kids and you don’t have any time for yourself.

I just feel ugh and I miss some things. yes one of them is kinky fuckery….I do miss that with my love :(

if I sound selfish you have no idea what I do daily or what I have done and still do for my daughters. They mean the world to me and I do everything for them every single day.

at least I have therapy tomorrow morning. yay :)


hope you all enjoy your Thursday tomorrow and have fun watching the 50 shades trailer <3

feelings when I read fifty shades…………

I am re reading again fifty shades of grey and I get a bit sad and teary eyed because well I am in a relationship as such but not much time for the kinky fuckery. 

My favorite moment with my love is when we first got together. I wore a black fishnet body outfit and He cuffed me in my black leather felt purple cuffs to the bed. My body was completely stretched out. I was laying on my back. 

He would have me this way for several hours which felt like an eternity in complete and utter pleasure. 

He would kiss my body and completely tease my nipples and completely made me just shutter and desperately want more. He would also insert inside me a buzzing medium dildo and had that inside me for the entire time. having me squirm and I was in anticipation as he had me there and while he was playing his games on the computer. 

Pure torture but in complete heaven. Would also use the soft horse flogger on my body mixed with the rubber band flogger. I loved every moment. 

So I cry and get a little depressed when i read fifty shades because I miss the intimacy. Yes we still have our moments but barely have the long scene sessions. 

 well being a mom and such always comes first and we are just busy especially summer keeping them active and outside a lot. Biking, swimming, going to the park, etc. 

One day probably when I’m 50 we’ll have more of those moments lol. 

That is one thing I have noticed in the BDSM community they are all old and in their late 40’s 50’s which no one really talks about. But it’s true they are mainly old. They have grown and their children grown and etc. 

So it’s interesting if you ever attend a much or anything to get acquainted with these people they are wonderful and great to talk to and ask questions. 

so that is all i wanted to get out lol. 

real BDSM

Okay I have indeed read Anne Rice’s erotica and All three of the E.L.James Fifty Shades Trilogy books. They were very good.

It kinda makes me upset and mad when these women after reading this book think it’s a game or they want it in real life. When they probably don’t know or understand these terms in real life.

I know because I have been in a REAL BDSM relationship. Unfortunately it was a bad relationship. I was abused emotionally, physically, and sexually.

When I say physically I mean actual real physical hurt. I was kicked in my ribs over and over, my head bashed into a wall, slapped in the face when I had crying spells, etc.

The Physical pleasure of flogging and such I enjoyed and my body escaped into a wonderful paradise. Which is where people think that’s the physical abuse and no it’s not.

BDSM : Bondage Discipline Sadism Masochism

When you are a SUB you do have more say about what happens to you and you can say YES and NO more in the relationship. Most SUBS are just doing it for kicks or would rather not be fully committed.

when you are SLAVE you don’t have as many rights or say in the relationship. YOU are putting yourself FULLY into your partner’s hands. Life, Body, Soul, and Mind.

I was 22 when I really got into BDSM. I met someone on AOL and he was a pretty nice guy for awhile. Well he would only come over once every 3 months. It was a lot emotional toil for me. I got out of it and didn’t see or anything from that person again.

I was hooked and my body wanted more I wanted more. So I went on the site Collarme.com and there I put my profile on and I put myself as SLAVE because that’s what I wanted. I met a man online we chatted on the phone and hit it off. I lived on the east coast and he lived in the west coast.

Things got serious and we did a contract (which in BDSM relationships there is a contract in which if something goes the way you did not want you can there fore leave the relationship in tact.

I moved from the east coast to the west coast. We met and yes I went right to living with this man immediately. (I know sounds dumb and stupid I was 22 lol).

Things went well for maybe a month then his mentor said you need to have two girls in your house. Well in our contract I had put no forced bisexuality.

That changed completely. When I didn’t do something he said do I would be punished. At points he would throw furniture, dishware, food items across the house. I was completely scared. Did not know what to do I was stuck there. I had no family or anything. I was scared I was going to die or if I did reach out to family he would hurt my family.

I stayed in the relationship out of pure fear and horror. I was forced to go down on women, have a three some with his ex wife, and another time with his ex girlfriend.

He had brought another girl into the house it was terrible. Luckily she got out and escaped and was able to move back to her family. She was a nice person but was 18 yrs old maybe and had no clue what she got herself into.

Afterwards he had me doing swinging where I would have to have sex with other males. It was terrible it wasn’t what I wanted at all.

I tried leaving him 6 months after we were together while we were at a wal mart. The manager was trying to help me leave but I got shocked and too scared to actually leave. When we got home he trapped me in the bedroom and bashed my head several times against the wall. I was 6 months pregnant with my first daughter.

I was stuck and stayed in the relationship for 5 1/2 years. I got lucky HE DIED. YAY MOTHER FUCKER! He had diabetes 2 and his liver and kidneys shut down and he died in the hospital.

If you don’t believe there is a higher power you are stupid.

So if You want to really be in this lifestyle I suggest you highly be safe and do a complete back round check on who you are getting involved with.

I’m not going to tell the whole story because he also verbally abused my daughters and yes I tried sending hints and telling DHS they did nothing.

SO these books you are reading they are pure FANTASY. they have nothing on the real BDSM lifestyle.

I am in a better place now my daughters have and are getting what they need. I am in a better place now and go to therapy and such. I have a new boyfriend we’ve been together for over 3 years now and yes we do BDSM but I get way more say in what goes on and such so pretty much you can say I’m a SUB. because i’m not going through the terrible experience again and i’m not letting anyone take me down anymore.